I am so happy to report that after a rough Saturday at the hoarder friend’s house, it sounds like there’s genuine, albeit tiny progress.
Even the tiniest bit of progress is enormous.
Saturday started with the friend and I working in one small area, maybe 2′ x 3′ at the most. It sounds small but it’s incredible what she’s been stacking in there.
As we worked our way through the pile, she was letting things go! I couldn’t believe it! Like I’ve said, I’m very patient so we talked about things and she told me where she got some of it and why she was keeping it or getting rid of it.
Everything that left was on her own accord.
She did all this! I just put the stuff in bags as soon as she said it could go.
Who else here still has hundreds of these in their house?
By the time we got the bedroom door open, she needed to sit down. No place to sit anywhere in the house so she had to make her way back out to the sun room. I did a little more and then got stuck.
So, I had to call in the big gun – my mom. She has no empathy for this mess so she comes in and gets things done fast. Get rid of this! Get rid of that! Put this over here! Put that in there! Not only did she help me finish up that corner I was stuck on but she cleared out the path to the toilet that had been filled.
That tiny progress was a miracle!
Ok, not quite a miracle but it was a great help. The whole problem is that it’s so hard to move and then there’s no place to put anything in the entire house. You want to make piles or keep a garbage bag nearby but you can’t.
By the time we left, I knew what had to be done next. We still need to get the bathroom cleared out more so the toilet can be fixed. After that, her bed needs to get cleared off. It’s full of books that are falling on her at night.
Those two things are the next most important but it’s impossible with the condition of the entire house. Before I can do more, I need her to do some decluttering on her own. It’s too hard to move in there and my allergies are out of control when I’m there.
So here’s the assignment that I gave her for the week:
Set a timer for one or two hours. Every time it goes off, you have to go into the bathroom and get rid of 3 or 6 things. That’s it.
The rules are that they can be as tiny as a pin, or as big as you want, they can be garbage to throw away or things to donate to charity.
At the end of the day, the garbage must be taken out to the garbage can. The donation bag can either go right into the car or put in the sunroom until we can get there to take it out.
These were the rules and my mom relayed the message to her.
I’m excited to say that she stopped over at my mom’s house today and made a few comments that made it sound like she’s doing it! She’s making progress! That’s been my whole goal all along, to get her to see how many things are in her house and teach her to declutter on her own.
As most hoarders know, once you get overwhelmed, it’s almost impossible to start without some outside guidance and that’s what I want to give her. She’s just stuck and needs a little help.